jomak

Timeout

So we’re now counting down to the last of the festivities, gearing up for a ‘real start’ to 2012 and wondering if we have eaten too many pineapple tarts for our own good. The work season is beginning soon and we know it.

Even as Christmas, New Year and the Lunar New Year whoosh us by, giving us a chance to slow down our paces and spend some quality time with our loved ones, we are also thankful for the mindless hustle and bustle I guess, somehow.

2012 got off on a light trot, which I am thankful for. The fog surrounding the year is slowly clearing up, and I’m seeing deeper and further into the months ahead with a contented heart. With a year like last year, being contented so early on in the year is a good sign. 

Of course, there are new things to look forward to, some quite incomprehensible like ____. 

Others are just pure weird, like being part of a national project to redesign cemetery way-finding visual markers.

Still, opportunities are opportunities the same. Whether is it for work or otherwise.

So as I bask in the last remaining days of the Lunar New Year, allow me to be a little bland (just like the direction this post is heading in), a little dull, a little slow.

Just a little timeout for the brain.

_

Just a little rest before the big game.

Inadequacies

Itchy

It came in a flash. This itch to write again. This urge to pen down my thoughts, no matter how random it may be. Or perhaps, it’s because she has stopped writing, and I feel this need to continue, on her behalf. 

I’m not too sure myself. 

It’s been a muggy draggy break thus far. 

Even as the year draws to a close and the warmth of 2011 seeps away, the next year beckons alluringly. There’s just something magical about 2012. A somewhat passionate and exciting kind of magic. 

There are more weddings to attend next year than ever before. While it may seem like a huge blow to my very very shallow pocket, its always nice to be present witnessing the start of a shared life together.

_

Need a little magic here.

Yes. And so it ends.

Though it has only been a short two months or so, it felt like I’ve been doing this forever. This is not to say that I know it all or have learnt all that I need to, to survive in this industry. But there’s just this ease as I settled into the daily affairs of work. Of course, my colleagues and superiors had been awesome. And furthermore, at times when I don’t know what to do, God’s guiding hand is always there helping me to find a voice and to cajole a creative concept out of nowhere.

Yet deep down inside, I miss school. After all the glitz and glamor of work – meeting celebrities, going on oversea business trips and managing international events, I feel all the more like the twenty-three year old wide-eyed undergraduate that I am. ADM had been a dream, and later, a dream factory to me. I feel that I’ve not dreamt up enough great things to be later translated into reality. I need to return and do just that.

This internship has also revealed to me a side I thought I never had. I had thought that I was terribly rational, single-minded and pragmatic. But I thought wrong. There were times I questioned the squelching of interesting creative concepts for practicality’s sake. Now, I know I actually do have an active right brain (aesthetics, creativity, feeling). it’s just that my left brain (logic, accuracy, analysis) calls the shots most of the time.

I feel humbled by the sudden shower of opportunities, but yet I know that at this point in time, I would still be more comfortable doing things a normal undergrad will do. I miss wearing jeans everyday, rushing from class to class, eating my yong tao foo at canteen two, and fretting about my project that is due the next morning. 

The internship is ending in a few days time, marking a conclusion to an enormously fruitful and productive semester break. A break, it may not have seem to be. But given a choice, I wouldn’t exchange this for anything else in the world.

Back to school. 

A Pensive Moment

It has been a whirlwind semester break, thanks to the demands of my internship. And such a ‘pensive’ moment is far and few between. You can’t exactly say that I’ve not been thinking or reflecting. Mind you, I’ve been using my brain for my sometimes-14-hours workdays.

It’s tiring. I’ll not attempt to hide that fact. And on some days, its the adrenalin that’s doing all the work, not the robot you see drifting in and out of meetings. 

But having said all these, I wouldn’t exchange this for anything else in the world this holidays. What a great start to corporate creative work. The opportunities are truly once in a lifetime. I just wished I had an actual day after my exams to sleep in and loosen those tense shoulder muscles. Alas, the Big plan was to dive straight into work.

The aforementioned exams had been kind too, so have all the Profs that mentored me the past semester. The only one module I felt that I deserved that elusive A, I got it. The rest were just a reminder of God’s grace.

“Come and remind me. Come and remind me, of who You are.” 

I think that in the midst of all these clutter, no matter how good or bad they may be, its crucial to plug in to the right source. 

It’s been a month of ‘reminders’ so far.

No. Not those from the pesky iCal on my MBP. Those, we can easily forget about or forgo the dateline. But the reminders from above are unforgettable. They are just what we need to carry on with the vigor of life. 

Receiving reminders from heaven = My pensive moments

Good times and stuff like that

It is a strange time to write. Not when Prajmaparamita, Durga, Dong Son, Sukothai, Prambanan, Mount Meru, and other fantastical terms are swirling around in your head. 

It is not a good time indeed.

Yes, it is the final stretch for art history. I’m sad to see it go. I’ve learnt to accept it, embrace it and to a small extent, understand it. I’ve come to realize that it is benign, just like the Naga that shelters the Buddha, a serpent without its bite.

But having said that, I’m glad that I can finally push it out of sight. This journey of two years will come to an end tomorrow.

Yet, good times are just round the corner, if I may optimistically suggest. The holidays officially starts after the conclusion of the paper tomorrow. I’ve got a rewarding internship to look forward to. And art friend is just a short stroll away. Yay.

Ok. Perhaps the last point wasn’t so apt, but you get the drift. 

I think I do need a bubble of “me time”. I can’t alway be a “you man”. The holidays will be a good time for that. 

Scheduling in some “me time” for the next couple of weeks.

Not Settling

Many people I meet and know are settling.

No, I don’t mean settling down with your better half.

What I’m referring to is the act of settling for less.

While I can’t say that I have a strong aversion to people like that since I myself had been a habitual ‘settler’ in the past, I am increasingly opposed to the act of settling for mediocrity. The human potential is something that is God-given, and to squander this tenacity and persistence away is truly unwise. 

As a Christian, I’ve often heard of the parable of the talents in Matthew 25. And here, I quote Matthew 25:14-15.

“For the kingdom of heaven is like a man traveling to a far country, who called his own servants and delivered his goods to them. And to one he gave five talents, to another two, and to another one, to each according to his own ability; and immediately he went on a journey.”

If there was one thing that I learnt from this two verses, it was the fact that everyone is given talents, skills and abilities. But alas, different ones and to different extents. As it was written, they are given to each according to his/her own ability, and in this case I would substitute the word ability for capacity.

Hence, your capacity determines the type and amount of talents you receive. Though it does baffle me how in the world could one quantify a talent, but apparently it can and it is.

So, back to the trend of settling that I’ve been noticing around me. I find that instead of living out and living in the full potency of the talent bestowed on us, many are settling for mediocre results in life. Of course, a blind over-zealous strive for perfection is unwarranted, but there still ought to be a tiny fight, struggle or even push on our part to break personal limits and experience breakthroughs from time to time.

As I see it, it does get more difficult as we grow older. We become jaded, less inspired and we feed on our former glories (if we even have them). 

Still, not matter how difficult it may be, I’m definitely not settling. 

It’s just not my thing.

When I consider how my light is spent
Ere half my days, in this dark world and wide,
And that one talent, which is death to hide,
Lodged with me useless, though my soul more bent
To serve therewith my Maker, and present
My true account, lest He, returning, chide

- John Milton

Choosing Positivity

The past two weeks had been tough. Unending work, datelines and a lack of creative juices have threatened to dampen the month of April. But I’m glad that the silver lining came. Just in time for the final critiques and approaching examinations. A positive spirit is absolutely necessary to produce good work. And I mean it with all my heart.

The stress level had been so intense at one point that I would stare at a blank screen for hours, and even after that not produce anything decent. Thank God I knew bad work when I see one. Trashing out all the bad stuff is the first step towards a great project submission. 

Though nothing spectacular has happened to brightened up the atmosphere, I think a switch in my attitude made all the differences. And am I glad I can proudly conclude the semester in approximately one month’s time with my final Art History paper. Though illuminating, I think I’ve had enough of Art History courses for the past two years.

Choosing positivity.

Turkeys and stuff like that

I’m a strange person. I write at my busiest, and slack off penning anything when I’m reasonably idle. Yes, I’m still writing, despite an impending 5am work night.

I’ve kinda set things in perspective for the rest of the year again. Yes. Work. Work.

But this time it feels slightly different, more major in a sense. It is definitely more professional, commercial and on a larger scale as well. Indeed, the slow start to the year has given way to such a rhythm of opportunities. And I’m thankful for it. I guess the willingness to socialize has its benefits.

3 years of God’s goodness.

In bowling terms, it’s call a ‘turkey’. Having three consecutive strikes.

In my terms, its consecration and dedication to the One who truly matters that has brought me thus far. 

And boy, what a new day it has truly been.

Be. Creative. Nao.

So, I’ve resumed to working late into the night (or wee hours of the morning, depending on how you see it). And I’m finding it recharging, energizing, and even relaxing. My new place has a constant cool breeze that would come through the windows - definitely less muggy than my previous. 

But I do need some creative juice to hit home. Nao.

Or I’ll not just be working late into the night, I’ll be working through the night. And that’s not good. Not good at all.

I need something David Gan would approve.

Tidying Up

I was just tidying up my online portfolio when I realized that I’ve not been writing here in this space for some time.

The past couple of weeks have been, well, a pretty sickly time for me. I’m just glad that it’s over now, even though I’m on the road to a full recovery. 

I feel that this experience is part of life. What life is about and constitutes of.

Birth. Growing old. Falling ill. And finally, death.

It may seem like a morbid subject to be writing about at 1am in the dead of the night. But I guess if we rethink our mortal life here on earth, there’s nothing to really fear in this cycle that everyone will definitely go through. The crucial factor in this is whether you’ve got a higher calling that is sustaining you throughout this lifetime. Something to hold on to. Something to believe in. Something that is bigger than yourself.

This season has also revealed to me the best and worst in the people around me. Some are genuine, while others are simply self-absorbed. I’ve always prided myself in having a keen discerning spirit when it comes to judging people’s characters. I guess it can be considered a gift.

The past weeks had been a crawl, and I’m glad that things are picking up again. I really do need to be up and about. People around me will say that this is a sign of my workaholism, but I personally view it as something energizing. I need to be constantly on-the-go. Doing something and working on one thing or another.

And I do need to start exercising. I’m almost skin and bones. Almost. 

It’s a New Thing

Ok. I’m skiving. I’ll admit it.

Instead of preparing for my presentation slides and going through my pointers a million times over to ensure a smooth delivery, I’m writing an entry. 

Well, it’s my first night at the new place. I’m tired and a little cranky. So, work can be left till later. Says who? Says me.

It’s a much more comfortable place I must say, and much much quieter. Something I have longed for ever since I started studying deep into the night to escape the noises of HV. It’s a night spot, and my old place was right smack between two carparks. You can imagine the level of noise I’ve had to endure. 

Over here, I can stare out of my window and see a ‘meandering’ railway track. And the way it just goes on and on inspires me. At night, the lights are pretty captivating, 34 floors up.

All’s well. I shall sleep well tonight.